Couple of things!
> Sister got me a fitbit. I am allergic to something in the paint for it, if not the silicone itself: I wore it for a day and now I have eczema, and also a line across my wrist. I've just switched wrists for now, haha.
> I've been thinking about the Cass thing and discussing it very slowly with both offline friends, and C/B, and.. hm.
It's just uncomfortable for a lot of reasons. Part of it is, like.. I think being upset about the way that people view your characters is silly. But Pheres is one of my unambiguously ethnic characters, which is a choice I made deliberately - every feature that could read as non-white, I made non-white. So when other characters - played by white players - consistently say things like his natural hair texture makes him look stupid, it is actually really aggravating.
And when one person consistently has her characters pick on that trait - along with the rest of his appearance, mind, but highlighting his hair especially - it makes me want to, friend or not, be a huge asshole in response.
And then, when you add that into the fact she's constantly putting down the character, it feels.. awfully racialised? She has all of her characters treat him as incompetent, malicious and childish. She mocks the biggest indicator of ethnicity (curly hair). She treats him, ooc, as perpetually unreasonable, and all together, I've just started getting a sinking feeling every time she has her characters interact with him or his sister, because while he gets treated like an idiot that needs to be put into his place, she just flat out has her characters dislike or ignore the sister.
Which, uh, isn't better.
Especially when all of her attention is focused on the two characters who DID "put him in his place", and are explicitly both Euroamerican culturally. And one of whom explicitly behaved hideously abusively, and the other whom just was a dick who took advantage of a teenager, and.. she's turned the first thing into a joke? One that has left my character highly aggro about hers, but also, like...
IDK, it bothers me that people are aware ooc, but there's no way for it to ever come up IC without sabotaging Maecii's CR thoroughly. Or making sure that I don't.. want any of my characters ever interacting with them again, haha.
Because "she is repeatedly throwing my dead romantic partners name and barbs about him to my face at me, for no reason, after he TRIED TO KILL ME. She has threatened me. She's broken into my fucking house, and all I ever did was offer to share my clothes and say we should go shopping, because we're both goths" is not something that strikes me as an upsetting chain of events, OOC, but the idea that it's something that would happen and my character gets punished ic for being a fucking victim is 1)seriously not something I ever want to play, and 2) actually kind of fucking distressing, on every level, considering that I'm not at all certain this is not some discomforting expression of racism with the purpose of putting a non-white dude in his place. Not that I think Cass would ever think of it that way, but this is terrifyingly coming close to that in actual play, and...
Like, okay, my city is hella racist. The USA is hella racist. I already have to worry about someone deciding I'm being uppity IRL and taking offense, or going to the wrong part of town at the wrong time, or one of our resident neo nazis deciding to make a point about race mixing, or getting pulled over by a cop and fucking shot. I've been trying to downplay this, but it's moved past "I am being silly" and onto "I don't care if I'm being silly, when the idea of your friend paying attention to your character makes you feel stressed, this is the point to disconnect those plots".
So! That's what I'm doing. Part of me is like "talk this through", but I have tried and I have tried, and there is absolutely nothing that I like less then having to bring up race to white people. And I've asked, and I've pried about wtf every single characters issue is with mine, and I've never gotten a straight answer, so. No.
(Two year long ship that I love down the drain. I'm so pissed, but she doesn't even like rping that character, so. It'll work out for the best, I guess.)